Pulp

It was nothing, really.  Just a little wood pulp.  But it caused a stink I hadn't anticipated on an otherwise inauspicious Monday.  One minute we were sitting down to spaghetti alla gricia and the next, we were moving storage boxes out of the putrid water rising in the basement.

I'm sure it wasn't my fault.  Sure, I've been known to flush a paper towel or two down the toilet.  And maybe some of the organic kitty litter.  But that couldn't really be the culprit.  Could it?

I've done some really boneheaded things in my life.  It's really hard for me to stay in the present, so I'm often lost in thought and make errors all the time.  Like the time I was so focused on what to pack for vacation that I tripped over the curb and broke my knee.  Or the time that I was thinking about getting home in time for the sweet Mother's Day celebration my family had planned for me but ended up getting pulled over for speeding.  Or the time that I totally burned a pan because I sat down to write while the duck was in the oven.  You get the picture.

I'm a klutz.  I'm forgetful.  But I've been really trying lately.  Please forgive me.

Like this post.  I began it several days ago and it was an unfinished draft when I, instead of saving it as a draft, accidentally pushed the publish button before it was finished--ooops!

So I think maybe forgiveness has something to do with acceptance.  When I accept something just as it is, not as I want it to be, I can let go of my expectations and be at peace with myself and others.  That doesn't mean that hateful, disgusting acts of violence are acceptable.  But rather I can come to an understanding of the fallibility of all humanity and I can choose to act out of a place of love, of drawing closer in relationship, rather than react in fear or anger or dissolution.

So I can forgive whomever flushed too much toilet paper.  I can receive the truth of what is, and then I can let go of my anger at having to clean up several inches of putrid water in the basement.  I can let the fresh water wash away my unrest.  And then I can take away the toilet paper and dispense it per usage in small amounts :)